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Dreams of Nash

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Last night in that half awake half asleep state I thought of Nash. He was walking beside me breathing on my hand.  This was the way we always walked.  I had my right hand on his lead and his nose was up against my hand.  I could feel his warm breath.  I have  had a few horses through out my life but I never felt as connected to one as much has Nash.  Maybe it was because I truly rescued him and he came from an abusive past that he felt safe at GSF and knew he was home.  The grieving process is interesting, I have had a blessed life with out a lot of the loss of those closest to me, but I can honestly say I am still grieving the loss of my Nash.

This past Saturday after we finished working on the new fence my friend’s and BF surprised me with a beautiful collage of my favorite pictures of Nash.  I feel truly grateful to have such awesome pictures of him taken by Judy and given to the farm as a donation to his hernia fund.  (Here is the original plog post about it.)  The pictures captured his heart and I will treasure them forever.

We were all coming up from the back field.  Bringing the ATVs and Tractors back up to the barn.  They were all acting a little suspicious as the BF was trying to intentionally slow me up and not rush through the barn.  He had me “help” put the tractor away (he didn’t need any help). I heard him check with my friends that they would meet us on the other side of the barn.  As I walked in I noticed all of them gathered at the far end of the barn.  I knew something was up, but for the life of me couldn’t figure out what.  Then they presented me with this:WP_20141020_16_08_03_Pro__highres

I could not believe they had all done this for me.  So quickly after his passing and it even included his name plate from his stall door.  I was so blown away that tears started streaming down my eyes.   They all came in for a group hug and I noticed a glimmer of tears in some of their eyes too.  Thank you all for this beautiful gift!  I will treasure it forever.  I look at it every day as it hangs on the wall beside the front door in the great room.

Good Bye, My Sweet Boy: Nash

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It is with a heavy heart I write this post.  Nash’s condition did not improve over night. Despite all of our efforts last night which included a broad spectrum of Antibiotics, Anti-inflammatories, and fluids through the nasogastric tube I found him in worse condition this morning.  The neurological condition/disease/infection that he had was starting to effect his muscular function.  He was using all his might to stay up right all night.  By this morning, we confirmed his bowels had completely shut down and there was nothing else we could do.

I took the morning off to be with him for the last hour before the vet came. I found him this time laying down and struggling unsuccessfully to get up.  I sat with him, talked to him and cried. It was a peaceful time in his stall.  Thankfully Rachael came over to support me through this process and say her goodbyes.  We were with him through the passing and it was the best way for a loved horse to go;  I held his head the petted him and was there for him the whole time.

These are the last pictures I have of him from the past 2 days.

These some of my favorite pictures of him. The professional photographs are the work of Judy Reinford.

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Nash Update Day 3

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Nash is not eating barely anything. He is chewing really slowly when he does and seems like he forgets to swallow. I tried twice to get the doxy in him today. First time it poured right out of his mouth. Second time. I had to stick my hand in to get him to open his jaw and I think he swallowed most of it. Last night since 10. He didn’t drink water. But yesterday day time had like a half a bucket. The only thing he seems to want to eat is grass and now this morning he is only nibbling here and there. Still walking like he is drunk, which seems to have gotten a little worse.

Love is…

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love is

One of my lesson students took this picture of Nash before her lesson on him.

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Weekend Warm Up – What a Tease!

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Last weekend was great.  It was in the 40’s (which now feels like a heat wave) and there was lots of activity on the farm.  Starting with a trail ride with Cuervo and Nash at 10 am Saturday.  Nash decided to be a freak and was bouncing around like a rabbit.  Everything was scary when I was on him, but when I walked him things were fine. Cuervo enjoyed the ride and even had a spring to his step.

WP_20140201_10_52_12_ProThen we had a lesson. My girls are troopers and have stuck with me the whole winter.  It is fun riding in the snow bareback because the horse keeps you warmer.

Then the ferrier  came to give everyone mani/pedi’s.  While he was there the girl scouts came over to lend a hand for their volunteer hours.  They cleaned all the cob webs out of the whole barn and goat house.  Thanks Girl Scouts!

WP_20140201_13_48_45_ProFinally the day ended with one more lesson with one of the Girl Scouts.  Her mom even posed for a picture while I was photographing from a top of Nash.  Yes Bareback to keep me warm.

On Sunday GSF’s favorite photographer Judy Reinford brought out her client for a photo shoot with Nash.  Now my horse has been in more photo shoots than me!  Again it was a great afternoon for it the weather was warm, but there was still snow on the ground for the picturesque winter couple photos.

While we were waiting on the wardrobe change we had role reversal and I snapped a shot of Nash and Judy.

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Nash – Back in the Saddle

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So this weekend I decided that it was time to ride Nash again.  His first time out and I decided to use him in a lesson.  So I got on him first and we rode around a bit to see how he was feeling.

He seemed to be fine and happy so we got on with our lesson.  About half way through the lesson Nash decides to roll.  The student on his back got her foot stuck as she was trying to get off of him as he was going down to the ground.  So Rachael and I ran to help her.  Well the process of us running up to Nash spooked him.  He jumped up too fast and off went his student, landing right on her bum.  Then Nash proceeded to run around like a nut cause everything was exciting then.  We calmed him down and got the girls back on him for some pony rides.  After the lesson I ran him around a bit.

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Day 16 Nash is almost home!

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Yes, he was discharged today. We are currently in transit but wanted to post this as it will be my only chance tonight. image

I will post tomorrow about final instructions and bill.

Thanks again for all your support and following us along on this crazy journey.

Day 13/14: Positive progress continues

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Things are continuing along the positive path, Nash’s temperature remains to be normal.  On Saturday they stopped one of the 2 antibiotics that he was receiving via IV.  Then on Sunday morning they were please to find the fever didn’t return, they have kept him on the one Antibiotic (Gentamicin).  The good news is that if he remains fever free tomorrow they will discuss with me having him come home early next!  YES, finally talking about my boy coming home.

Fingers crossed and positive thoughts for Nash.  Thanks for all your kind words and support!

 

Day 12 The fever broke!

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Went to see Nash today and finally met Dr Parente. At that point he had been back on the iv antibiotics for 2 days. He said his fever went from 104 last night down to 101 this morning. The lung fluid culture grew gram positive bacteria. So that means he does have pneumonia.

What we still dont know is when he can come home. Dr P. said he has to talk to the specialist to ask his thoughts. Maybe a couple more days.

I have to say Nash didn’t look good. He lost weight and the swelling in his legs was really bad. He didn’t even move to say hi. We went in and petted and brushed him, still he didn’t move. Then as we went to leave he gave us the said eyes. He  walked to the door gave me the “don’t leave me look”. Oh my gosh, broke my heart.

Can’t wait to get my boy home!
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They shaved his chest for the ultra sound.

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He licked my face.
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Smile Nash!

Day 10: back to square one

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Dr Parente said today that there are no bacteria growing in the cultures, which indicates no lung infection or pneumonia. The new antibiotics are not working and he still has a fever.  They decided to put him back on the IV antibiotics, with the thought that he didn’t start the fever till they switched him to oral.  He indicated he might be able to go home this weekend.

The bill so far for Nash is $5,000. Luckily and thankfully the donations went over my goal and we have about $700 more.  Dr P. said that with the IV ABX we will be looking at about $200 per day.  It will be close but I think we will be ok.Dust Storm

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